24 December 2022

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Before I go any further, my Just Giving page will remain open for a period and you can find out more or donate via my Just Giving page << HERE >>.

I've got to be honest, I never thought I'd get here. But here I am. 52 mixes, well a few "selections" in there, but the general point stands. 52 mixes. 64 hours 30 minutes and 24 seconds of music. 771 tracks. 601 different main artists. 90 remixers / editors (+ countless featuring musicians and artists) on 360 record labels. At the time of typing, a disappointing 4547 plays across Mixcloud and Soundcloud, and those are certainly not going to be full and completely engaged plays.

I want to place on record my heartfelt thanks to those who have supported my effort, whether by donating or sharing what I've been up to - you know who you are! As things stand, £360 + Gift Aid has been raised for Sue Ryder, which of course was the point and motivation behind this project. I could be wrong, but I suspect the donations have come from 8 people outwith my own household. I say that I could be wrong because several are anonymous donations, at least some of which I suspect have come from my other half because she knows this has been a difficult thing for me to do and won't like to see me feeling like a total failure in the things I do, but that is generally how I do feel. I think around £160+ Gift Aid has come from the kindness of others and for that I'm grateful, but of course wish for the sake of Sue Ryder it would have been far more, so suspect the remainder has been from my other half, and some from my own donations from selling some of my records.

I started this project with enthusiasm and put a lot of effort into trying to drum up interest and support. I shared my experience, wore my heart on my sleeve and put my cards on the table for all to see. I created an Instagram, which I was kicked off of in less than 3 months for "breaching" their terms; I can only assume it was from tagging artists and labels that featured each week.... Instagram didn't tell me of course. For some time I would tag artists and labels on Twitter which proved to be a waste of time too. The hope was that they'd perhaps share the mixes on their social media and therefore give me a chance of growing the interest organically. Sadly it didn't happen and my drive evaporated over time, particularly because in the early days of Twitter or Facebook this was how most people generated interest and connections. It seems things have changed, but I've no idea to what, or where I went wrong with that.

I've really struggled this year, not just because I've lost a lot of direction and the responsibility that was on my shoulders when I lost my Mum, but also because there's been an awful lot not right and missing in life and this endeavour has shone a light on some of that and in particular how few people I have in my corner. I shouldn't compare myself to others, and I try not to, even limiting my access to (anti)social media, but I still see other people doing things and having their friends, family and the people linked to those connections being very visibly supportive and I can't be anything but honest and tell you that it hurts quite a lot to not feel like you have that in your life. It's more painful when there's a light shone on that week in and week out. This is obviously just a very small aspect of my world and there's little point (other than the cathartic benefit) in sharing any more on here.

I'm relieved and glad that this is over. I don't think there's much future for "mixamorphosis" any more. At one point I could see a path forward with what I was doing around music but when life became heavily weighted towards my Mum, and then losing everything through being hacked several years ago, things have never clicked for me again. From 2009 to around 2014 the blog, followers, interactions were overwhelming, over the past few years it's like I never existed, never did nothing or helped anybody, contributed to nothing and finding that sweet spot to build has disappeared. Or if it's still there I no longer know where to find it.

I'm sounding like a broken record here, which is fitting because I do feel pretty broken, in more ways than just this nonsense. I could go on about loneliness, isolation, depression, anxiety, zero confidence, no real life interactions, physical aches and chronic pains but there's little to no point. I spend hours worrying about what to do, what to write, what I should or should not share, and ultimately it does not matter because for 45+ years my voice has not been heard and I doubt there's much hope for me to change that now. This project has kind of hammered that home to me and if I'm being totally honest, I've felt like burning it all to the ground and deleting everything I have online than I have felt like completing this. I'm a stubborn fool at times though and I'd have felt like I failed myself more than anything if I didn't finish what I set out to do, even though it's of little interest to anyone out there.

I've nothing else I can say now. After 52 weeks of this, it's not going to suddenly and miraculously grow arms and legs. I'll leave this here. #01 is a selection of music I have loved. I could have done this a hundred times over with thousands upon thousands of different tracks, but this is what came out as I felt it on this occasion. All I've ever wanted is to share music that has triggered a feeling, emotion, a movement, since I was a child it's been something I loved to do. That's what I've tried to do via my mixes, blog and posts through the years.

I expect I'll be posting less on Twitter and it may or may not be the last post here and on the music hosting sites, I doubt it matters either way. My voice doesn't carry.


01. From The Willowmeadow - Mayflowers (Self Released)

02. Alan Watts - Life Is Not A Journey (No Label)

03. Weyes Blood - It's Not Just Me, It's Everybody (Sub Pop Records)

04. Air - Les Professionnels (Source)

05. DJ Shadow - What Does Your Soul Look Like (Part 1 - Blue Sky Revisit) (Mo Wax)

06. DJ Cam Quartet - Herbie (Attytude Records)

07. Matthew Halsall - I've Been Here Before (Gondwana Records)

08. Kahil El'Zabar - We'll Get Through This (Spiritmuse Records)

09. Nina Simone - Backlash Blues (Live at Montreux Jazz Festival) (BMG)

10. Dave Brubeck Quartet - Take Five (CBS)

11. Guru ft. Roy Ayers - Take A Look At Yourself (Chrysalis)

12. Fela Kuti - He Miss Road (Wrasse Records)

13. Hugh Masekela - Don't Go Lose It Baby (12" Version) (Jive)

14. Kuniyuki Takahashi - Afric Univers (Mule Musiq)

15. Martin Patino - Hommage A La Sodomie (Suara Records)

16. Joep Mencke - Sabda (Klassified)

17. Vincent Gericke - Mebuki (Amselcom)

18. Lamb - Cotton Wool (Fila Brazillia Remix) (Kudos)

19. St Germain - Montego Bay Spleen (Blue Note)

20. Bob Marley & The Wailers - Waiting In Vain (Island)

21. Andy J Dobbs - Long Waves

22. Everything But The Girl - Walking Wounded (Dave Wallace Remix) (Virgin)

23. Underworld - Skym (JBO)

24. Svaneborg Kardyb - Everything Possible (Gondwana Records)

25. Ane Brun - I Want To Know What Love Is (Balloon Ranger Recordings)

26. Vieux Farka Touré et Khruangbin - Savanne (Dead Oceans)

27. Tyler Newman - La Ramble @ Midnight (Solid.Grey.Sky.Recordings)

28. Arthur Russell - This Is How We Walk On The Moon (Point Music)

29. José González - Crosses (Imperial Recordings)

31. Nick Cave - Cosmic Dancer (BMG)

32. Medicine Head - Just Like Tom Thumbs Blues (See For Miles Records)

33. The Doors - The End (Elektra)

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18 December 2022

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Well, it's the penultimate mix of the year and I'll save my summary of that until next week. What I will say is that there's a narrative and a feeling from this weeks mix; sometimes the title, sometimes the vibe of the track, often both, that sums up how I feel and where I'm at. Not just now, but for quite a long time. That's not a grumble, it's just how it is. Today isn't the first time my eyes have welled up thinking about things whilst I'm putting a post together. Whether it be the purpose behind this year of mixes, the person behind the point of it all, the position I find myself in, the fact it hasn't quite panned out as I hoped. If I can summon the energy / will to build on that in next weeks post, then I will but I'm finding energy and focus and motivation in short supply, so we'll leave it at 'see what next week brings'.

Of course, I have to mention that the 51 mixes (well there's a handful of "selections" in there) that I have posted so far this year have been about one thing for me - trying to raise some funds for the work done by the people at Sue Ryder. They help people with serious neurological conditions live their life, you can find out more via their website, or on my Just Giving page if you feel like a small donation is something you can manage, or you can probably pick up a few bits of understanding what this is about by digging through some of the pages on this blog.

Of course, I always try to provide a linked up tracklist to the mixes I post, you'll find it below and please support the artists / labels where you can. Buy their music, follow their socials, share their posts etc. It's what keeps things going, you know?


Good Weather For An Airstrike - Frozen In Thought (Hibernate)

Blurstem - Far Too Long, Far Too Lost (Anthem Falls Music)

Myosotis - Small Existence (Hidden Vibes)

So, I'm An Islander - O Di Haij Ret (... And They Were Right) (Hidden Vibes)

Thomas Méreur - A Steady And Sad Process (Preserved Sound)

Dag Rosenqvist - To Not Forget (Hidden Vibes)

Kieldfel - And The Tide That Takes Us Away (Echoes In The Valley)

Hania Rani - Ghosts (Gondwana Records)

Olga Wojciechowska - Walk In My Shadow (Time Released Sound)

Matthieu Karsenti - Resilience (Slowcraft Records)

Trigg & Gusset - Ominous Clouds (Preserved Sound)

Andrew Wasylyk - The Life Of Time (Claypipe Music)

Kenneth James Gibson - Unblinded (Kompakt)

Visionary Hours - No One To Be Seen (Preserved Sound)

The Echelon Effect - Nobility In Loneliness (Good Weather For An Airstrike Remix) (Self Released)

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11 December 2022

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4 December 2022

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If you caught last weeks post [here] you'll know that this mix is a continuation from last week and sits in the sphere of electronica and ambient by my reckoning. Assigning genre tags has never been a strong suit of mine and I think constantly narrowing genres to this narrowest margins is counter productive to opening music up to people who might otherwise skip by and disregard. For me, it's much more helpful to give a general idea or feeling about a track, album or mix than the narrowest definition possible. So any disagreement on the genre tags I may use are fair and fine by me, but this is my approach and I'll stand by it.

Once more, I'm going to be a little lazy when it comes to pointing out why I'm posting weekly mixes through 2022 and just copy and paste what I posted last time around. I set out at the start of the year to post a new mix every week as a challenge to myself and also as a way to try and raise some funds for Sue Ryder, a charitable organisation that helped provide care for my Mum in her final 3 years. The hope being that if listeners enjoyed what I posted that they might find it worthy of a small donation to Sue Ryder via my Just Giving page, where they receive 100% of all funds raised. Sue Ryder provide care and a home for people in Aberdeen with extremely challenging neurological conditions like MS, MND (ALS) and Huntingtons to name a few, as well as respite and palliative care centres elsewhere in the country. All too often these services are the kind that you don't realise the importance of until you find yourself in the position of needing to use them, and sadly there is a considerable waiting list for that. Like most people and businesses, the pandemic and cost of living has had a huge impact and support is very much needed to make sure these services can continue. So, if you have listened and enjoyed any of the posts this year, please consider a small donation. Find out more on my Just Giving page, or via the Sue Ryder website.


As usual, I will post a linked up tracklist below the player so you can find any particular track you may want to pick up, but it also gives a chance to follow and support the artists and labels by digging a little deeper yourself, something I very much encourage and hope you will do.




Brian Case - DCIN (Hands In The Dark)

Karima Walker - For Heddi (Keeled Scales / Ordinal Records)

More Eaze - Better (Past Inside The Present)

Stellardome - I Don't Belong Here (Hidden Vibes)

David Cordero - El elogio de la sombra (DRONARIVM)

Cold Womb Descent - Colony Of The Remnants (Hidden Vibes)

Steve Moore - You're Making A Big Mistake (Relapse Records)

Reinis Ramans - Luminosity (Growing Bin Records)

Matthias Puech - Badalisic (Hands In The Dark)

Takashi Kokubo - Fluctuation #2 (Glossy Mistakes)

Lucy Liyou - How To Build An Automaton (Full Spectrum Records)

Porya Hatami - Restless (Tomotsugu Nakamura Remix) (DRONARIVM)

Max Würden - Exothermic Reaction (A Strangely Isolated Place)

Slow Meadow - A Light Without Flame (Self Released)

Sachi Kobayashi - Communication (Hush Hush)

Jonathan Fitoussi & Clemens Hourriere - Instants Ephemeres (Versatile Records)




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